Another Day at Kellys Beach in the Year of COVID

It was a good day at the beach on Saturday, even though I had to walk much farther south than usual.  I had arrived a few hours later than usual and without a nudist presence established at the usual area of the beach the textiles had migrated southward.  Most of them came afoot but there were four boats as well, one of them on the lagoon side of the dune.

On the sea side of the lagoon the boat farthest south was crewed by a pair of disconsolate young teenage boys hoping to see naked women but still too far north for that.  They had scrawled “SEND NUDES!” in the beach sand but that didn’t seem to be working for them. 

I told the boys that if they wanted to see naked people they’d have to take off their clothes and go a some hundreds of metres south.

“What? Take off our clothes?”

I assured them that it was illegal to be clothed while on a nudist beach because only perverts did that.  They didn’t want to be arrested, did they?

They considered the matter, exchanging worried glances.  They considered for some time as I walked on southward.  When I was about one hundred metres farther on I heard their outboard start, turned about and saw them heading north at full speed.  I think that worked well.

When I finally reached the little nudist encampment I found about twenty people present including three textiles who had canoed across the lagoon and had laid out their towels maybe thirty metres north of the first naked folks.  All the nudes were ignoring the three textiles and the textiles were ignoring the nudes.  That too worked well as far as I was concerned.

Unwilling to cede beachfront to the clothen I set up my camp six metres or so from the northernmost nudes and maybe twenty metres south of the textiles.  My nude near neighbours were a couple whom I already knew from previous years.  By and by I got my camp in order, went for dip to cool off and then for a walk down the beach.  The ability to go for a long walk on the beach is something that I particularly enjoy about Kellys. 

I had walked to where I was just short of the point when I met first one, then two couples coming north.  They must have gone so far south looking for privacy and when they saw me walking down the tide line they hurriedly dragged on their beach kit.  I find such events to be both funny and sad.  No true naturist/nudist would object to being seen naked, at least not by another naturist, especially not one who was nude.  But there you go, they did.  When I got to within speaking distance of the first couple I said “You didn’t have to cover up for me you know, this isn’t a formal occasion.”  The woman laughed at this slight attempt at humour; the man grumped.  Maybe he thought I was being too flip.

Maybe it was the plastic dragonfly bobbing about above my hat on a stainless spring wire that put him off.  No, I’m not kidding.  These things are sold by both Lee Valley and Amazon, advertised as an anti-fly device – a “scarefly” if you will –  modeled on the idea of a scarecrow.  You can either buy the finished product or try your hand at crafting your own from twigs and maple seeds. The maker claims that the scare dragonfly, the most voracious predator of horse flies and deer flies, repels both of these annoying pests simply by frightening them away, no chemicals involved.  So I thought I’d give it a try.  Why not, I kind of like the look of them anyway.  I ditched the clip and sewed mine onto the side of my Tilley hat.  I’m not claiming that it worked because I’ve only tried it on one day so far, but it certainly seemed to work.  It kept the level of annoyance by the little rotters to an inconsequential level while other people, unequipped with their own guardian dragonflies, seemed to be swatting regularly.  I shall continue the experiment throughout the remainder of the summer to see what conclusion can be reached on whether the scareflies actually work.  All the same, I’ll be bringing my Dollarama extensible flyswatter along with me, just in case.

The New Brunswick Naturist (NBN) Club

The New Brunswick Naturist Club (NBNC), let’s just call it the NBNC, that seems easier.  The last time I made mention of the NBNC within this blog we had a mere 53 members.  Now we have 120 members and I know for a fact there are many other naturists in NB who haven’t joined because they feel a need to fly below the radar.  So, with an increase of membership of substantially more than 100% I thought I should post a small blurb about the club.

The NBNC is a very loosely organized bunch of Atlantic Provinces’ naturists, most of them living within New Brunswick.  Our Facebook presence is our only real point of contact.  We don’t have meetings, we don’t pay dues, we don’t elect a slate of club officers or anything else one usually associates with a club.  We just have an aggregation of like-minded people or, sort of like they said in Monty Python and the Holy Grail, “we’re an autonomous collective.”  So far that has worked well enough for us.  We run into each other at the beach from time to time, have a chat, maybe have a beer, exchange news and views then go our separate ways.

Here is the group description quoted from the Facebook page:

The NB Naturist Club is a family-oriented, non-landed group, based in southern New Brunswick, founded in 2008. The group hopes to lobby government in order to enhance access to naturist beaches in N.B.

While the Province of Nova Scotia has agreed not to prosecute naturists for merely being nude on the beach area at Crystal Crescent, there is much more that needs to be done to improve access to the waters in New Brunswick. We need a location in NB like Crystal Crescent that officially recognizes naturism. There are locations that are used by naturists but are not well known by the general public.

The Club hopes to hold pool swims and other events during the winter so that naturists in the province can enjoy naturism year round. Various nudist groups in Halifax have been successful in gaining access to pool facilities and we look forward to having the same success here. Therefore our initial focus will be on finding a pool in New Brunswick that will give us access for nude recreation.

The group is primarily for naturists in New Brunswick and the other Atlantic Provinces of Canada. We ask that those prospective members in neighbouring provinces first join a group in their own province or the "Canadian Naturists" group.

Take note that this is a safe space. Harassment and begging for pix will not be tolerated.

PRINCIPLES

The NBNC adheres to the principles and definition of naturism agreed at the XIVth  Congress of the International Naturist Federation (Agde, France, 1974):
“a way of life in harmony with nature characterized by the practice of communal nudity with the intention of encouraging self-respect, respect for others and for the environment.”  
Communal nudity and respect for others demands that we be inclusive and social.  Those who advocate “couples only” naturism or any other sort of exclusive idea are free to go elsewhere.

For very good and valid reasons, both ethical and legal, we agree that the  practice of social nudity should be asexual.  Sex is all well and good in private places.  But in public places it becomes lewd conduct and those who engage in that are also free to form their own group.

The NBNC is a naturist club, not a nudist club.  Some people don’t see any difference between the two terms but, in my own opinion and the opinions of many other people there is an important divide.  Anyone can be a nudist, all one has to do is take one's clothes off.  Naturism is a state of mind, a belief system of sorts and an international movement.  Naturism is so much more than just taking your clothes off.  It isn’t really about nudity, that is merely the visible manifestation of a belief system with physical, psychological, social and moral benefits coupled with respect for the environment. As articulated by the INF naturism is all about respect for self, for others and for the environment – nature. It is a more natural mode of living in which ethical personal  nudity is the most visible marker.

APPLICATIONS TO JOIN

The NBNC on Facebook is a closed group so if you wish to join you must apply.   All applicants are asked to answer a short series of questions.  If you don’t answer the questions your request is automatically declined.  So please, if you are interested, be interested enough to read and answer the questions. 

Although most of our members live in New Brunswick there are some from the surrounding provinces and a few from farther afield who have ties to NB.   Unrelated and most international applicants are declined.  Sorry, but if we accepted every applicant the local people would soon be overwhelmed by others.

We vet all applications as much as we are able. Our goal is to keep the NBNC as a group of like-minded people.  If an applicant’s Facebook profile is closed or blank so that the group admins cannot get any sort of an idea about the person the application will likely be declined unless it comes with a recommendation from an existing member.  Sometimes mistakes are made but we rectify them as soon as we become aware of any problem.  That’s where member participation comes in.  In keeping with being an autonomous collective we are self-regulating.  People who apply to join under false pretenses or who transgress the principles of naturism or diverge from the group norms can and will be expelled from the NBNC. 

All this is in aid of being able to put our hands over our hearts and state truthfully that we represent true naturist principles.  Those who are minded to do otherwise can go elsewhere.

If you live in the Atlantic Provinces and you think that the NBNC might be your kind of folks feel free to apply.  The admins aren’t online every day but approvals usually occur within two or three days.

Thanks for taking the time to read this.

SHORT NAKED HIKES #3 – SEELY BEACH LOOP

This hike has no official name because it uses a number of different trails.  For lack of official recognition I’ll call it the Seely Beach Loop.

The Seely Beach Loop may be challenging for some people in terms of length (14.5 km) but it is not too bad in terms of difficulty.  However, when you are doing Phase III of the loop keep in mind that this is a wild forest trail with plenty of gnarly roots waiting to trip you.  You will want a good solid hiking stick, not some skinny-assed collapsible aluminum pole.  See my Rules for Hiking Naked blogpost for other stuff you might want to take with you.

Where – Fundy Trail Parkway, via St Martins.

Access – Access to this loop is via the Fundy Trail Parkway – a day fee must be paid at the gatehouse

Once you’re past the gatehouse drive on and enjoy the views.  Watch for parking lot P14 on the far side of the Little Salmon River and past Long Beach.  Park at P14.  Conveniently, it has an outhouse where you can take care of last-minute business before starting your hike.

Trailhead – Parking lot P14.  Trailhead is signed "Seely Beach."

Summary of Distances
(All distances are approximate – taken from Google Earth)
Phase I – Trailhead to old woods road ~ 1.3 km
Phase II – Old woods to Cradle Brook access trail ~ 5.9 km
Phase III – Cradle Brook access trail to Fundy Footpath ~ 3.4 km
Phase IV – Fundy Footpath to Seely Beach ~ 2.1 km
    (Plus Seely beachfront ~ 500m)
Phase V – Seely Beach to Parkway ~ 1.3 km
Total trail distance ~ 14.5 km

Phase I – Take the marked trail from P14 and when you reach a point 50 feet / 16m or so from the parkway turn left and head off through the forest. This is a good place to get naked.  There is no trail at this point but it is easy walking through moss-carpeted forest floor with lots of room between the trees.  Keep far enough inside the treeline that you can't be seen from the parkway but generally no more than the 50 feet / 16m – there is a reason for keeping this distance.  Feel free to wave at any passing motorists – they can't see you but it is good fun anyway.

Fairly soon you will come to a pretty good woods trail that crosses your course at a right angle – DO NOT take this trail, it leads to the construction rubble dump behind P14 so you would have to start all over again.  Cross the woods trail and continue to parallel the parkway and, by and by, you will come to a second good woods trail – if you get too far away from the parkway you will miss it.  In fact this second trail is an orphaned section of the old access trail (and older horse road) that leads to Seely Beach.  Turn LEFT on this trail, it will soon curve around to the right, and follow it to its end.  This trail is in very good shape (there are even some of the yellow blaze marks still to be seen) and is easy walking (for your convenience I cleared most of the smaller deadfalls) until you come to the end where it is quite wet for the last 20m or so.  (Fun fact: in October 2019 the tracks on this trail showed that it is a favourite path for one or more moose – just thought you'd like to know.)  Once you've crossed the wet section you will find yourself standing on an abandoned parkway construction road built on top of an older woods road.  Turn LEFT and set off on Phase II.

Phase II – From the trail junction follow the old construction road West, becoming North, becoming Northeast – hike and be happy because there will be no traffic coming from behind and there is plenty of easy cover on both sides of the road.  The road itself is bad at first, soon becomes better and then changes to be pretty darned good, culverts excepted. About 700m on you come to a cleared area with a T-junction to the right -- go STRAIGHT.

There will be several more trail or road junctions to come: T-junction 1.6 km right, Y-junction 1.9 km left, T-junction 2.4 km right, Y-junction 2.6 km left, T-junction 2.8 km left, T-junction 3.0 km right, T-junction 3.5 km left, Y-junction 3.8 km left, Y-junction 5.0 km left and T-junction 5.4 km right. Only four of these are important but if you don't have a good map or satellite photo I mention them so you can use them to keep track of your progress.

The four important junctions are:
– the T-junctions at 2.8 km (where your path now becomes the Old Salmon River Road) and 3.5 km, both which might be sources of  vehicle traffic;
– the last one, T-junction 5.4 km RIGHT (Approx Latitude 45º28' 58.77" North, Longitude 65º20' 13.64" West) which is where you turn and head back to the parkway.  Another 300 m brings you to the parkway where it crosses the Cradle Brook access trail – there are wooden swing gates at this point, STOP out of sight of the parkway;
–  the fourth important junction is the T-junction to the right at 3.0 km (marked with a No Trespassing sign in a white barrel) which might be handy if you need to abort the hike and get back to the parkway in a hurry.  This junction leads to a maintenance area and then to the parkway, a distance of ~ 500m or 700m depending on the route you take through the maintenance area.

If you’re staying naked to cross the parkway pretend that it is a railway crossing – STOP, LOOK and LISTEN for traffic and, if the coast is clear, hustle your butt across the road and get down the trail out of sight of passersby.  We don’t want to annoy either tourists or parkway staff, right?  Right!

Phase III – You are now walking on the Cradle Brook access trail, a long-disused forest harvest road.  Very suddenly (150 m from the parkway) you will come upon a T-junction on your left.  By the condition of the two forks of the road the one on your left appears to be the obvious route – it is NOT.  GO STRAIGHT AHEAD on the road less travelled, it gets better quite soon.  Continue along the grassy lane to the next T-junction on the LEFT at 1.8 km.  Turn LEFT and go up a gentle rise for 200 m to where the road makes a 90º turn to the RIGHT.  Follow the road another 1.1 km to its dead end. This brings you to the start of the Cradle Brook access path which takes you out of the sunshine and into the forest.  Follow the YELLOW blazes painted on the trees to where it joins the Fundy Footpath 300m on.

Phase IV – You are now on the Fundy Footpath, a hiking trail that has welcomed naked hikers for years before the parkway was built and ruined it.  It used to be that when you met people hiking the Fundy Footpath you had a 50/50 chance of them being naked.  Now, the chances are lower but it still happens.  There are directional signs at the point that the access trail meets the Footpath – turn RIGHT, Seely Beach is 2.1 km westward – follow the WHITE blazes painted on trees.  Much of the trail dipsydoodles up and down through uncut forest until maybe the halfway point where it begins a long descent along the spine of the ridge that separates Seely Brook from the seacoast.  Watch for change-of-direction markers (double blazes) especially near the bottom of the ridge where it looks like the trail continues straight but actually makes a sharp LEFT turn and a sharper descent.  The final part of the descent to Seely Beach is on one of the Footpath’s many cable stairways installed with much labour and now in need of some maintenance.

Not the cable ladder at Seely Beach but much the same

Congratulations, you have reached Seely Beach.  There are two campsites here so you might want to ensure there are no textiles hanging about before deciding to take a rest and catch some rays on the beach in the altogether.  I don’t recommend going for a swim in the sea because the Bay of Fundy is just too perishing cold for it to be fun.

Phase V – Leaving Seely Beach.  Go to the point on the beach where Seely Brook drains into the sea and you will find the second campsite and a rough trail – an old horse road, really.  Follow the trail to the point where it crosses the brook without benefit of a bridge – there is usually some place a bit downstream where you can find stepping stones and get across the brook dry shod.

From the brook the trail takes a fairly steep 1.3 km diagonal course up the flank of the ridge to meet the parkway 122m above sea level – this is the cardio portion of the hike.  Be aware that you may meet people coming down this trail and there is almost no opportunity to quickly leave the trail or to get behind cover. Far  better to keep well aware of the trail ahead and to have a hiking kilt or a pair of shorts that you can step into very quickly.

Return to the trailhead.  Once you have reached the parkway you have two options: get dressed and cooly walk back to P14, or stay naked and cross the parkway when circumstances permit.  If you decide to cross the parkway remember to STOP, LOOK and LISTEN for traffic.

You’re back.  Hooray!

Now, that’s the route I took because of the circumstances of the day, BUT you could as easily do the whole thing in reverse, hiking down to Seely Beach as your Phase I.  Two items to note about hiking the loop counter-clockwise:

(1) if there are no other vehicles at P14 the chance of meeting anyone on the trail down to Seely Beach is pretty low.  However, be aware that there may be overnighters at the campsites; and

(2) the long downhill section mentioned within Phase III above now becomes a very long UPHILL cardio section.

But . . . different strokes for different folks.

WHAT’S BUGGING YOU NOW?

KNOW YOUR ENEMIES
The Flies of the New Brunswick Wilderness
also of Nova Scotia and Prince Edward Island


Walking about naked brings numerous health benefits, both physical and psychological.  This is indisputably correct – those who dispute the rightness of naturism usually fall back on superstitions about morality rather than dealing with real issues.  However, there are a few health problems too, usually resulting from sunburn and insect bites.  For sunburn the twin answers are common sense and appropriate sunscreen.  For the insects it helps to know your enemies.

If you’re a New Brunswicker, Nova Scotian or anyone else from almost anywhere except the inner cities of North America probably you already know everything written below.  But folks from far away – for instance, those who have been living in the depths of an urban area, or in a cave on Mars – might benefit from reading the rest of this post.

Here in New Brunswick (and adjacent provinces) the usual suspects bugging you are, in ascending order of size: midges, blackflies, mosquitoes, stable flies, deer flies, horse flies and greenhead flies.  Why does this matter?  It matters because these various sorts of flies are very different critters, respond to different stimuli, often attack different areas of the body and require different responses and preventative measures.

Disclaimer: What works for one person may not necessarily work for all others.  Personal body chemistry may bring about different results.  Some people are just naturally attractive.


MIDGES

New Brunswick has at least two kinds of midges the Chironomidae family and the Ceratopogonidae family.  Those of the Chironomidae family are non-biting midges, they simply lack the mouth parts to do it. In fact, adult Chironomidae do not feed at all, they spend their brief lifespan focussed on mating and reproduction, then expire and their little corpses feed other species.  Those of the Ceratopogonidae family are biting midges, the dreaded no-see-ums. 

Midges look a lot like mosquitoes but aren’t.  They are tiny, only 1-3 mm in length, but their bites still sting like crazy. Only the female midge bites humans.  Typically midges are grayish, becoming more reddish when filled with blood.  Their wings display dark patterns.  Ceratopogonidae midges are creatures of the late afternoon and early evening and they are not at all particular about where they bite you. 

So what keeps midges at bay?  Well, 98% DEET seems to work but do you really want to do that to yourself?  I don’t.  The efficacy of lower concentrations of DEET is questionable.  Midges are nothing if not persistent.  However, they are weak fliers and do poorly in windy conditions so the siting of your camp can be an important factor.
 
Some people claim that 0.5% permethrin spray is a do-all for dealing with midges and everything else including deer ticks.  But permethrin is a problem in that it is a NERVE AGENT.  It doesn’t repel the insects, it attacks the little beggars’ nervous system and kills them outright.  Permethrin is intended to be sprayed onto clothing, NOT ONTO SKIN.  So permethrin isn’t a safe choice for naturists.  Err on the side of caution and don’t use it except on clothing.  As of 2019 permethrin is not approved for sale in Canada; it can be imported from the US but the price is startling once you’ve paid for shipping.  Maybe that is a good thing – I wouldn’t use it.  Call me a wimp but I just don’t feature spraying myself with nerve gas.

Other folks claim that picaradin is the good option – I like it a lot.  Picaridin is synthetic piperine, an alkaloid extracted from the black pepper vine.  Like DEET it works by disorienting and repelling insects, not by slaughtering them wholesale.  Picaridin based repellents such as Icaridin and Piactive can be found in retail outlets such as Canadian Tire or the Temple of Wal.

What do I do?  When sitting around the campfire I rely of smoke from some sort of resinous wood – pine cones and cedar seem to be fairly effective but don’t keep 100% of them away.  I supplement the smoke with a picaridin based spray and that seems to work for me, but maybe that has more to do with the time of day than anything else.  They are attracted to light so one can hope that they fly too close to the campfire’s flames and meet a horrible fiery fate.

When it comes right down to it repellents provide only limited protection. The best way to avoid being bitten by the dreaded no-see-um is to schedule your outdoor activities in a manner that avoids the daily peak the midges’ activity.

Point of interest: I have yet to see a biting midge at Kellys Beach.

Midge in flight – Image thanks to ClipArtMag

BLACKFLIES

Folks from away might not know this but the blackfly is New Brunswick’s unofficial provincial bird.  Oh sure, the black-capped chickadee is a lot cuter but we have so many more blackflies that people have made up tales and (in Ontario) even a song about them.  If anyone should tell you to go easy on the poor little blackfly because he pollinates blueberry plants look them straight in the eye and call “bullshit.”  This is a silly folk tale and has been proven false, so feel free to swat the little pests.

These guys are small, not much more than 4mm long in a resting posture.  Black fly populations burgeon with the onset of spring and can last well into July.  The females of the species bite only during daylight hours and tend to home in on areas of thinner skin – neck, ears and ankles.  Of course, if you’re naked there are more such areas.  Blackflies are puddle feeders, what this means is that they gnaw a hole in your skin, wait for the blood to well up and lap up all that red goodness, possibly transmitting pathogens to you in the process.

Be judicious in your use of repellents.  DEET and picaridin are the most effective repellents, but they provide limited protection. However, blackflies like shade and are not strong fliers so even mildly breezy beaches are your friends in this matter.

Blackfly displayed – Image thanks to Google Free Clipart Library

MUSKY TOES

There are thirty-seven different species of mosquitoes in New Brunswick – Woo hoo!    No, not really woo hoo, more like “Yuck!”  Of these thirty-seven species, thirteen are considered to be major pests for human, one (anopheles) is minor and the remainder rarely bite humans.  Only one of the major pests (ochlerotatus cantator) breeds in salt marshes.  So, in terms of what you might encounter at Kellys Beach, this is the one. It is also the most common mosquito species found throughout New Brunswick. 

So, how do we deal with this pest, and all other musky toes?  Easily, it seems.  All mossies seem to be put off by the usual range of easily available repellents – DEET, picaridin, etcetera.  Besides, when the sun is out on the beach the mossies are cowering in the shade somewhere else.  Wind is another ally against mosquitoes which can make a maximum forward speed of five km/hr (3 mph) and a pleasant breeze on a beach usually exceeds that speed.  So you’re good on the beach but if you’re inclined to hike naked in the woods bring along some bug spray that doesn’t bother your skin.

Mosquito preying – Image thanks to Clipartbarn

OTHER SORTS OF FLIES

Some visitors to Kellys Beach whinge and moan about the flies, not midges, mosquitoes or blackflies, but deer flies.  Well, first of all, the flies that are sometimes a problem at Kellys are NOT deer flies. Yes, sometimes (rarely) there are a few deer flies at Kellys and some horse flies, particularly on the North Kouchibouguac Dune, but on Kellys most commonly the problem is either or both black stable flies or greenhead flies. See the pix in the text below.

Deer Flies and Horse Flies

Deer flies and horse flies are closely related, both being members of the Tabanidae family.  They are known for their speed (some species reaching 145 km/hr in case you're wondering – no, I didn't forget a decimal point) and aerobatic abilities.  Swatting a horse fly in flight is a good game to play provided you don't mind losing almost all of the time.  As with many other species of biting fly, only the females bite.  Adult female horse flies have mouthparts that are sort of the Swiss Army knife of biting flies: a strong stabbing blade, two pairs of sharp cutting blades and a sponge-like bit used to mop up the blood from the wound.  And it is a real wound that they inflict.  Horse flies can transfer blood-borne diseases from one animal to another.  If you get bitten, treat it as a real wound, clean it and disinfect it as soon as possible.  If you're at a sea beach and have nothing else at hand to do the job wash it out with salt water.  Sure, it'll hurt like stink but that's preferable to developing, for instance, tularemia.

Horse fly image thanks to Bruce Marlin and Wikimedia Commons

Deer flies and horse flies most often attack the uppermost part of your body, your head for instance. There are ways and means of dealing with this issue, for instance wearing long upright feathers or a fake dragonfly on your hat – yeah, you look like a dufus but you don’t get bitten. (Decoy dragonflies can be bought on-line.)  Or, speaking of dufusses (dufii?) you can opt to carry an umbrella treated with diluted Tanglefoot. Neither deer flies nor horse flies respond well to repellants unless you are using something that will probably kill you too – DEET has no effect.  Deer flies are quite fragile; horse flies are not.  Deer flies can be dealt with by means of a cheap swatter; horse flies seem to require a billy club.  No, seriously, a good smack with a baseball cap should incapacitate them long enough for you to beat them to death with the club.

Deer fly image thanks to Wikimedia Commons

Stable Flies

The black stable flies at Kellys are the primary cause of annoyance to sunbathers.  These critters are small all-black versions of the standard housefly, about 8-9 mm long from head to the tips of their folded wings.  They are quite sturdy little creatures and often need to be swatted then stomped because they will stagger to their feet and fly away from a swat alone. Like the blackflies they are puddle feeders.  They prefer to dine on the lower portions of the body – calves and ankles – and they don’t give a damn about DEET.  However, they do not like to chew their way through oil and a generous slathering of baby oil both puts them off and slows them down so that you can swat and stomp before they can bite.  Re-apply the baby oil after swimming or wading, and whenever you notice that it is losing its effectiveness.  Picaradine spray actually works against stable flies, as soon as they alight on it they bugger off without attempting to bite.

Black stable fly image thanks to Fir0002/Flagstaffotos and Wikimedia Commons

 Greenhead Flies

Greenhead flies (Tabanus nigrovittatus) are the worst of the bunch. In fact they are a large type of horse fly so everything already said about that species applies to the greenheads.  Greenheads are BIG and they don't seem to have any particular preference about where to bite.  When they bite they actually take a chunk of skin out of you. Luckily they are slow to bite following lighting on your skin, stupid and surprisingly fragile. A simple swat usually kills them but feel free to give them a stomp to register your disapproval of their species. Also lucky is the fact that their season is short.  DEET based repellents don't work against the greenheads any better than they do against the stable flies.

Greenhead fly image thanks to Maximilian Paradiz and Wikimedia Commons

However . . . one source recommends using Avon Skin-so-Soft bath oil.  Avon disagrees but . . . if a good coating of oil has the same effect on greenheads that it seems to have on stable flies maybe it is worth a try.

Meanwhile, some guy in New Jersey has invented a device that he claims wards them off.  This is the "Greenhead Greenaid" which he sells from a website of the same name.  On this item I have no opinion.  I will reserve judgement until I have seen it work, or not.  If you try it please let me know if it was worth the $20 US.

So there you go, there is the line-up of usual suspects.  Have fun in the sun . . . and say a word of thanks to every dragonfly you see, they prey on every one of the pest species noted above.

SHORT NAKED HIKES #2 – AQUEDUCT TRAIL

AQUEDUCT TRAIL

This is not an official hiking trail and it has no official name, these two facts combine to explain why it isn't overrun with hikers.  It is the access trail for the water conduit from the Ludgate Lake reservoir to the NB Power generating station at Coleson Cove . . . (water conduit = aqueduct – so I call it the Aqueduct Trail . . . that works for me.)

Where – Hwy #1, West of Saint John, NB – Lat/Long 45º11'49.57" North, 66º12'54.36 West .  Use these coordinates to look it up on Google Earth and get a god’s eye view of the lay of the land.

Access – Directly to the south side of Hwy #1 about halfway between the exit for the Spruce Lake Industrial Park and the exit for Prince of Wales.  If you can see Ludgate Lake on the north side of the highway, la,

Ludgate Lake to the North

look for this pumphouse and gate on the south side – that’s the trailhead . . .

If you are coming from Saint John take the Prince of Wales exit and come back on the eastbound lanes of Hwy #1 so you can park on the south side of the highway.

There is no parking area per se but the shoulder of the road is broad enough to safely park near the gate.   The trailhead is easily recognized but not signed.  Once through the gate, past the pumphouse and a hundred metres or so past the open area beyond (the natural gas pipeline right-of-way) you should be okay to get naked.

Length – Trailhead to turnaround point is approx 2.2 km, a nice short hike with the added benefit of it being all in the open so you can work on your tan while you hike.

Degree of difficulty – Easy

Description – The trail is a single lane with loose stone cover, is wide enough for ATVs and shows clear signs of being used by them.  There is scrub vegetation to the left that gets bush hogged every ten years or so.  To the right there is mixed forest, fairly thick and owned by the Nature Conservancy of Canada – you’ll see their signs every now and then.  This photo shows the long views typical of this trail . . .

. . . so if you see someone coming in the distance you have plenty of time either to slip into something less comfortable or to step off into the forest and wait for them to pass by.

Suitability for naked hiking – I know that this trail is used by ATVers because I’ve seen the tracks, but having hiked there 25-30 times over the last ten years I have yet to see an ATVer (or anyone else) out and about.

Overnighting – not recommended.  However, I know that some people have camped overnight at Cheeseman Beach –see Note 2, Option C below and my Cheeseman Beach blogpost.


Important Notes: 

1.  About three-quarters of the way between the trailhead and the second set of power lines there is a forest trail branching off to the RIGHT, la:  

This trail leads to Connors Lake, a fairly substantial lake surrounded by bog, and with a disreputable shanty erected by some ATVers who obviously have no intention of ever removing their garbage.  Before you get to the lake or the shanty the forest trail turns LEFT to join the service trail beneath the power lines and takes you back to the Aqueduct Trail after a detour of 1.6 km.



2.  When you get to the turnaround point, easily recognized as a wide open area in the middle of nowhere, you have a number of options open to you:

Option A, turn around and go back to the trailhead. 

Option B, go straight.  This is NOT a good option.  Another 200 metres brings you to the Burchill Stream where, many years ago, the roadway had been washed out quite comprehensively.  Not recommended.

Option C, turn RIGHT and follow the overgrown road 300 metres to where the bridge that crossed Frenchmans Creek was washed away many more years ago.
At LOW TIDE you can easily walk across the stream without getting your boots damp.
At HIGH TIDE this is PERILOUS, read "STUPID" because the water at high tide can be 10 feet deep.
IF you intend to cross the creek check the tide tables to make sure you have enough time to get back before the rising tide starts to flood the creek.
If you make a low tide crossing another 600 metres of bushwhacking will bring you to Cheeseman Beach.
ONCE AGAIN, MAKE SURE THAT YOU HAVE PLENTY OF TIME TO GET BACK.
Visit this DFO website  for a current tide table.

Option D, turn LEFT and follow the much improved dirt track 800 metres uphill to the Burchill Road, which is a more or less abandoned paved road heavily grown in with brush on both sides (as of August 2019) and barely wide enough for a single vehicle.  However, it is sometimes used by the Coleson Cove workers as a lunch site, mostly at the dead end near Hwy #1. Sadly, some of the locals find it convenient to dump their junk on either side of the road – not very edifying.  From the Burchill Road junction you can exercise either of two options:

Option D1, turn around and go back the way you came, all the way to the trailhead.  This makes for a hike with a total return distance of 6 km; or you can try

Option D2, turn LEFT on the Burchill Road and follow it to the dead end, turn LEFT again and follow the ATV track along the pipeline right-of-way back to the pumphouse trailhead, a total return distance of 5.3 km.  The good thing about the brush growing in on the sides of the road is that you can get under cover in a moment if you hear a vehicle approaching.  Have a close look at this option on Google Earth before you decide to do it.

I have done all of these options at one time or another and have confirmed them all on 03 August 2019.  

SHORT NAKED HIKES #1 – MOUNT DOUGLAS BALD TRAIL

Mount Douglas Bald Trail a.k.a. Bald Peak Trail

Where: Welsford, NB

Access – Burton Lane, to the right off Hwy 101 immediately past the Hwy 7 overpass
There is a parking area there and nothing else, with the trailhead easily recognized but not signed.

Length – Trailhead to summit approx 1.25 km, not much of a hike but pretty good cardio due to the vertical, and the view from the summit  is, I believe, well worth it.

The view from the summit looking south

Degree of difficulty – “Moderate” with the following caveats:

– for the most part the trail is more like a dry stream bed strewn with small boulders and gnarly roots than a trail – footing can be tricky by times;

– the trail is not groomed at all and is absolutely unfit for mountain bikes or baby buggies;

– the probable demographic for this trail is “younger & decently fit.” Because of the treacherous footing the trail is unsuitable for small children or older people, and impossible for anyone with impaired mobility; and

– this trail absolutely should not be attempted in the dark, fog, rain or while under the influence of anything.

The trail has a great deal of vertical, rising 180 metres over its total length.  Almost all of this is in the shade of thick mixed forest -- nice! 

Only the summit is open to the sky and an army helipad there makes an excellent sundeck.  The summit provides great views to the south of Mt Douglas looking down the Nerepis Valley.

Suitability for naked hiking – If there are NO other vehicles in the parking area you are likely good to hike the trail naked . . . I did.  Just keep a good pace so that you don’t get overtaken from behind.  If there are other vehicles there you are taking a chance as this can be a fairly popular trail on nice days.

Looking up to the summit from the plateau

Overnighting – not recommended but possible.  There is no camping area at the top or bottom but there is a plateau below the summit that has been used by campers in the past.  There are no facilities and no water sources near the plateau.  A campfire gone wrong here would be a disaster.

RAMBLING THOUGHTS

I’ve been off my game for some time and haven’t posted anything.  I’ll try to do better from now on.

I am, for lack of a better term, a naturist advocate.  That is to say that I advocate on behalf of the naturist lifestyle.  I would like to be able to claim that I am a naturist organizer, but I can’t.  I learned a long time ago that it is very difficult to organize naturists.  Every one of us has our own schedule and conflicting priorities that make organizing any group event an iffy business.  When you add the vagaries of weather to the equation it gets much worse.

Since I cannot manage to organize group naturist events I settle for advocating in general terms.  I have no difficulty talking to anyone, women or men, about naturism.  In doing this I have recruited a few new members and learned a few important things.

First, women are an easier audience than men, most are willing to discuss it, at least on the theoretical level, and many want details.  The fine print matters to them.

Second, talking to women about naturism can reveal some of the problems they have with participating.  Many, maybe most, of those problems deal with the men in their lives.  This is enlightening because conventional wisdom tells us that women do not participate because they lack confidence due to body image issues.  Some women see it differently.

A few have told me that they couldn't go to a naturist beach because their partner won’t.  When asked “Why not?” the usual response is “He’s too shy.”  Further probing reveals that the man has body issues, usually relating to fear of having a penis smaller than other men on the beach.  Oh the fear of comparison.  HINT FOR GUYS: Stop looking closely at people’s fun bits, it is rude . . . and weird too.

Other women have told me that they would be happy to go to a naturist beach but their partner is just “too sexual,” unable to separate the concepts of nudity and sex.  HINT FOR GUYS: Grow up!  There are times and places for sex and a public beach doesn’t provide either. 

Still other women have told me that their partner is simply too possessive and would object to other men seeing “his woman” naked.  To me this seems to be an extension of the problem of being too sexual, projecting that same attitude on all other men.  HINT FOR GUYS:  Naturism is by definition non-sexual social nudity.

All this information gained from chatting with women helps me to explain some of the behaviours I have noted at the gym: guys getting dressed or undressed in a shower stall; guys coming into the sauna fully clothed.  (Yeech!)  These behaviours have often made me ask myself “What the hell is wrong with men these days?”

I got some potential answers to that question the other day when I left the beach and went to the showers.  In the change room I witnessed three different scenes of hysteria (there’s no other proper word for it) from small boys as their fathers tried to wrangle them out of their swimsuits and into the showers.  “I hate being naked,” one little boy screamed.  “Huh!” I thought, “that’s weird.” When I was a kid nobody batted an eye about swimming naked at Scout camp, YMCA camp or wherever.  Half of my boyhood fishing trips ended up with skinnydipping, it was simply the done thing.  Apparently these days are gone, replaced by early childhood education in fear and loathing.  It seems that we are somehow training boys from infancy to be ashamed and afraid of their own bodies.  This is a very unhealthy situation.

RULES FOR HIKING NAKED

I was asked in a semi-oblique way to explain about hiking naked.  Some people have a great amount of trepidation about hiking naked – the fear of 'getting caught,' among other things.  So I have decided to write down my own rules for hiking naked.  Please bear in mind that these are my rules, not THE RULES, and you are not governed by them unless you choose to be.  So they are not rules per se, they are more like guidelines.  Feel free to adopt any or all of them, but when you are done they will be your rules, not mine.

MAXIM

If God had wanted humankind to be naked we would have been born that way.

 GENERAL

Get naked, keep calm and have fun.

The purpose of hiking is to hike, to get out in the open air and expose yourself to the natural world, to see a new trail or revisit an old one.  It is just a hike and, hopefully, not an adventure.  For most guys, whether or not we are honest enough to admit it, true adventure requires an even chance of death – sort of like any visit to the United States these days.  Women are usually much smarter about such matters.

The purpose of hiking naked is to maximize your own personal freedom and to be closer to nature.  Its purpose IS NOT to shock, dismay, annoy or alarm non-naturists.

DO NOT hike naked in hunting season.

Numbers matter.  Numbers are self-validating.  Hiking as a couple or in a group is far better than hiking alone.  Hiking in a mixed group is by far the best option.  There is a calculus of suspicion within the minds of non-naturists that runs something like this:

    – one man hiking naked alone is a pervert of some kind
    – two men hiking naked are gay
    – a group of men hiking naked are probably a gay gang
    – one woman hiking naked alone is a target for harassment or worse
    – two women hiking naked are much less of a target for harassment
    – a group of women hiking naked are far less of a target for harassment
    – a mixed gender couple hiking naked is self-validating and not dangerous
    – a mixed gender group hiking naked is self-validating and not dangerous

In terms of traffic volume on the trails weekdays are far better than weekends.  Holiday weekends during school vacation are the worst possible times to hike naked.

THE LAW

I am not a lawyer.  The following two observations are, I believe, correct.  They do not constitute legal advice.  If you want legal advice go to a lawyer.

Under Canadian law as it exists currently the following are your best bases for a successful defence in the unlikely event of prosecution:
1. that the location was sufficiently isolated that you felt you had a reasonable expectation of privacy. This point has already been established in law as a legal defence; and
2. that you did not intend to insult or offend any person and either covered up or offered to do so.

Women who choose to hike topless are breaking no law.  This has been affirmed in principle by the Ontario courts and upheld in the courts of British Columbia.  In keeping with the Common Law the same should hold true in all provinces except, perhaps, Québec, which has a different legal foundation.

LOCATIONS

Plan your hike carefully.  If you do not know the area in which you intend to hike check it out on a good topographical map, then on Google Earth.  If possible look it up in the most recent edition of Hiking Trails of New Brunswick by Eiselt & Eiselt.  Time spent on reconnaisance and planning is NEVER wasted.  Make your plan, rehearse it in your mind and with everyone else in your group.

DO NOT hike close to inhabited areas.

Know the route, the access points, the relative frequency of usage.

Use trail maps of the area if they are available.

Long horizons and open spaces are good but be aware of your environment and be prepared to react appropriately.

Once you have found a reasonably workable area for naked hiking DO NOT BLAB it all over the internet or you will no longer have it.  Feel free to share the information with friends whom you actually know IN PERSON – imaginary friends on Facebook don’t count.

BEHAVIOUR

On arrival at the access point if the parking lot has several cars in it be aware that you are not alone on the trail. You might want to reconsider the project for the day.

If the parking lot is empty and the trail is a single track in and out, you’re likely golden on the outbound leg; use greater caution on the return trip.

If the parking lot is empty and the trail is a single loop in and out you’re likely golden as far as the midpoint; use more caution on the back half of the route.

Act naturally!  What you are doing is perfectly natural, just somewhat unusual.  If you can think outside the box you can live outside the clothes.

Be polite. There are two universally polite greetings along the trail: “Good morning” and “Good afternoon” – being naked does not change this.

If someone says something ignorant to you gently return the favour by ignoring them.  DO NOT engage in a slanging match.

DO NOT annoy the textiles!  Cover up when you have time to do so.

When you don’t have time to cover up step off the trail and put a respectful distance between yourself and the textiles.

Watch your back, so to speak, check your back trail from time to time in case there is a troop of Girl Guides or a hungry bear coming up from behind.

Don’t annoy the bears either, ditto all other wildlife.

Be mindful of your surroundings.  Keep your eyes open and your ears too.  This is no less important when hiking clothed as naked.  When you are in the forest and you hear the approach of hoofbeats moose are far more probable than horses.

Keep your eyes on the trail ahead.  Be aware of your “meeting distance” – the farther you can see down the trail the more time you have to react to someone coming toward you. 

Meeting distance is also important when encountering wildlife.  Bears and moose are not uncommon, coyotes somewhat less so and cougars are rare but not unknown – know how to deal with all of them.

If you do ‘get caught’ don’t worry too much about it, it is a very strange naturist who objects to being seen naked.  Offer to cover up and if the textiles decline your kind offer just keep calm and carry on.  If they show an interest in naturism stay and talk to them, maybe you can convert them, or at least plant a seed of the idea.  Consider this to be evangelization among the clothen . . . never miss an opportunity to recruit new naturists.

Anything that you take into the forest with you should leave with you.  Don’t throw your crap into the forest!  Feel free to pick up and pack out crap left by morons.

EQUIPMENT

Some free-hikers insist that the only way to hike truly naked is to do so barefoot and without a pack.  There is a word for this.  That word is STUPID.

Carry a pack with some reasonable survival equipment and supplies in it, just as you would for any hike.  Include an Ace bandage or two against the possibility of a sprain. 

If you do not know what constitutes reasonable equipment and supplies DO NOT go hiking, regardless of your wardrobe choice, until such time as you learn.

DO NOT hike without something at hand with which to cover up quickly.  A hiking kilt is a good choice.  Remember, 'a man in a kilt is a man and a half.'

DO NOT think that you can somehow wriggle your legs into a pair of tight shorts in quick time.  More likely you’ll end up arse-first on the ground with your shorts caught on one knee and the other boot.  This is not an edifying sight but it is funny for spectators.

DO NOT hike barefoot!  No matter what the so-called free-hiking purists say hiking barefoot is deeply, dangerously, irretrievably STUPID.  If you injure your feet at some point distant from your car you have a long and painful hobble ahead of you.

Always carry a hiking staff or a reasonable facsimile thereof.  Collapsible nordic hiking poles are NOT a reasonable facsimile, they are useless crap as they will likely collapse just when you need them.  I carry a walking axe most times.  If I plan to go stream walking I bring a two metre long staff instead. 

SUMMARY

So those are my own rules, so far at least.  Who knows what new rules might be added with further experience.

Get naked, keep calm and have fun.

2016 Halifax World Naked Bike Ride

I went to the 2016 Halifax World Naked Bike Ride this year.  I support the idea behind the WNBR and have participated in other cities.  As noted in a previous posting within this blog, the WNBR is most definitely NOT a naturist event per se.  The WNBR is really about bicycle safety, with nudity used as a graphic demonstration to car drivers of just how vulnerable bicyclists are out there on the road.  That was how it started, but along the way it has become a stage for protest or consciousness-raising for a wide variety of issues including (but by no means limited to)  petroleum-dependency and legalization of public nudity.  It is a house of many mansions.

I set off for Halifax with mixed feelings about the ride in that city.  Previously, I had been told a number of horror stories about it by people whose opinions I respect, and I had seen YouTube video of previous rides, video that was rather cringeworthy in places.  Despite it being a house of many mansions it should certainly not be a stage for the exhibition of bad manners.  LESSON: If you want respect you have to give respect.

The run-up to the 2016 Halifax WNBR was sketchy.  One of the things that was wrong with the 2016 ride was the poor communication plan, compounded by the existence of two separate FaceBook pages with not-so-compatible information on each.  The FB page “World Naked Bike Ride – Halifax” is a public group that has been around for a long time and is no secret.  The 2016 Halifax organizers launched their own event page “Halifax World Naked Bike 2016, 9th Edition” then largely ignored the original public group.  This was a fatal error as confusion resulted, leading to uncertainty, leading to non-attendance.  The organizers should have monitored posts on both pages in order to correct any false impressions and provide timely info.  LESSON: Pay attention to your primary means of communication.

Then there was the problem of the route; there were two versions of it.  When v.1 was published it was far too long – people pointed this out and the organizers responded positively by issuing v.2 a day or two later, a route only half as long as the original.  So far so good but people were still discussing v.1 on the WNBR-Hfx page and it was not being corrected, leading to the fatal error noted above.  LESSON: If there are two active info sites, put your info on both sites, then monitor and make corrections if necessary.

Also, on the HfxWNBR 2016 page there was much dithering by the organizers about the weather.  Folks, if you’re going to dither, dither in private, not on social media.  If you dither on FB it confuses the issue and causes people to stay away.  LESSON: Don’t dither in public.  Think it out, make a decision and then stick to it.

In order to avoid parking problems in Halifax I biked in from Bedford and, having arrived quite early in the day, took the opportunity to scout out the route chosen for the ride.  This wasn’t entirely without a selfish motive, the morning was a little cool and the exercise would help keep me warm.  The route was quick enough, even with a couple of side trips, because traffic was minimal and I was lucky enough to catch nearly every green light.

When I had completed the route and arrived at the gathering place on Fern Lane (at 12:45) there was no sign, no one serving as a greeter and no one who seemed to know what was going on, or at least they weren’t telling much.  The organizers were largely uncommunicative, almost non-responsive.  But kudos to the guy with the music machine, he was cool.  LESSON:  An event like the WNBR requires a feeling of welcome, of inclusion and a little animation would have helped too.

I killed some time by wandering about Fern & May trying to keep warm enough and could not help but observe and reflect upon the organization of the event so far.  That reflection was making me bite my tongue because it wasn’t really any of my business.  Besides, things could still have turned out okay – only they didn’t.  I’ve organized lots of things in the past and the hard truth is that it takes work, engagement, communication, enthusiasm and teamwork.  Frankly, standing about looking taciturn, like a captain pacing the quarterdeck of his burning ship just doesn’t do the trick.  It seemed clear to me that the 2016 Hfx WNBR was a shipwreck in progress.  (Were those seagulls circling overhead, or vultures?)

At T minus 15 mins and counting there was no sign of either welcome or animation, except when the media showed up and one of the organizers began holding forth to one of the reporters.  I had previously spoken to one of the media guys and he told me that the organizers had told him that their “minimum number” for riding was twenty – if they didn’t get twenty they would cancel.

At this point there were nine prospective riders and four media people, the total of which was already outnumbered by pudgy camera-wielding perverts gathering near the corner of Fern and May like so many crows on a wire, eager for the first glimpse of (Gasp!) naked flesh.  I’m sorry to say that they would have been very disappointed by it as almost every rider there was an old guy.  Most of them had the sort of pasty complexions that had never seen a ray of sunshine.  Clearly few were naturists or they would have been tanned, at least somewhat.  It made me wonder just exactly what demographic we were dealing with and none of my conclusions were particularly complimentary. No women riders had showed up by that time, although one had stopped by momentarily and said she would be back.   As noted above, I have participated in other rides in other places and this one had no oxygen in it.  It was all too tawdry for me. At T minus 9 mins I got on my bike and biked back to my motel in Bedford.

On the trip to Bedford I decided that perhaps I hadn’t given the event a completely fair evaluation so, on reaching my motel, I got in my car and drove back to town.  That was when I realized they had cancelled.  (I learned later they had cancelled at T plus 2 mins, ostensibly because of inclement weather.)  Small wonder!

They rescheduled to the following day, Sunday July 3rd, but let us be crystal clear about the real reason for rescheduling – very few people showed up!  The ride was cancelled due to lack of interest.  It did go the following day, still with lack of support – apparently the smallest Hfx WNBR ever – when there was no bad weather to use as a codpiece to cover the failure.  But really, cancelled for fictitious bad weather?  C’mon guys, try to butch up a little!  Don’t blame your own shortcomings on Mother Nature.

Yes, I suppose you could say I should have taken that same advice and stayed until the bitter end, but I didn’t help organize this clinker and I could pedal away with a clear conscience.

In my opinion the 2016 Hfx WNBR failed for several reasons:

(1) delayed decision-making that led to a late announcement.  How hard is it to get together in the late winter or early spring and choose a date, make an announcement and proceed from that firm base;

(2) a poor choice of date.  The “official” date for the WNBR is the second Saturday of June, delaying until early July is not a good idea.  So too, holding it on a long weekend is not a good idea as it conflicts with too many other events and personal plans;

(3) poor communications and apparently no communications plan;

(4) bad route planning and the confusion resulting from it;

(5) very poor attitude at the start point;

(6) and, in very important measure, because of the hangover from the 2015 ride, a debacle in which the lead riders, in a stunning display of bad manners, invaded the Canada Games Team announcement on the Grande Parade.  This is not the first time some bonehead in the Halifax ride took the lead and dragged the rest of the riders into places better avoided, something similar happened with a street hockey tournament in 2013.  To reiterate a lesson noted above -- If you want respect you have to give respect.

Personally, I am neither here nor there with regard to the Halifax WNBR as it is presently organized.  In theory and in practice I support the WNBR.  But the Halifax ride?  I won’t bother wasting time or money to go to the 2017 ride – if they have one – so long as it is being run by the same people with the same bad attitudes.

But, returning to the issue of bicycle safety for a moment, like car drivers everywhere else those in Halifax are a mixed bag.  The majority seem to have no problem sharing the road – or at least they don’t want a bicyclist splattered all over their Lexus – but there is an important minority that certainly needs re-education and a tune-up of their attitude.  This was made abundantly clear to me on my trips back and forth from Bedford when I became aware of just how nasty some Halifax drivers could be – cutting cyclists off, crowding them off the pavement, invading the bike lane (or parking in it) or sneaking up close before blasting cyclists with car horns.  These people definitely have a head-space problem.   If the WNBR can help raise consciousness regarding this issue then rock on!

THREE DAYS OF NUDENESS

During the past three days I have been trying to make up for my low level of nude recreation so far this summer.  The lack of activity wasn’t my fault, it was imposed by the weather. Yes, I’ve made a few trips to Kellys Beach and other places but I usually try to get in more nude time than that.  So it was high time to make up for lost time.

On Wednesday I took off for a stream not too distant from home for a combination of stream walking (see my earlier post on this topic), fishing, swimming and tanning.  I had finished my lawn repairs the previous day (eight tons of topsoil wheelbarrowed around the yard to be spread and seeded) so I gifted myself with a day off.  If you’ve never gone fishing naked you should add it to you list of possibilities. (Helpful hint: watch out for your back cast.)

It was a beautiful day all way around: warm and sunny without being oppressively hot, the relative humidity was quite low and to top it off there was a nice breeze. Once at the stream I worked my way up the current, pausing to fish for awhile at each pool along the way but catching only one unlucky perch.  It must have been hungry because I was using a bare hook, and an barbless one at that.  After all, the purpose of going fishing is not necessarily to catch fish.  Sometimes it is just about getting out into the great outdoors and getting in touch with nature.  With this in mind I said “Hi!” to the perch, carefully removed the hook and placed the fish back into the stream, probably none the wiser for its ordeal.  Farther on a small sunfish was unhappily marooned in a shrinking puddle cut off from the rest of the creek.  With no small difficulty this fish was scooped up in my hat and liberated into the flowing water.  (It was Good Samaritan day you see.)  Finally I reached the pool I was headed for and lo, there was a big trout in it.  I could tell because as I stood in the shallows looking down into the water, it was stationary in the current looking up at me.  No, really!  Here was this trout, about eight or nine inches long, the ruler of this little stretch of the stream, calmly contemplating the sole angler around for miles.  Somehow I sensed that I had lost the element of surprise with this trout.  Besides, there seemed to be only one trout and there was no point in bringing home just one fish.  It takes a minimum of two of that size to make a decent meal.  I told him to relax and put my spinning rod away.

Did I mention the water?  Yes, it was at summer low but that has the effect of letting the sun warm it all the faster.  It wasn’t even slightly chilly, a fact emphasized by my standing waist deep in the pool without the slightest shiver.  So, fishing was cancelled and replaced by swimming, making the day a three-for-one.  (The trout didn’t seem to mind sharing the pool.)  After the swim I had a bit of a lie-out on the little sand beach beside the pool in order to increase my store of vitamin D.  This made the day a four-for-one, plus bonus points for the lack of mosquitoes. All in all, not too shabby a day.



On Thursday, it too being a beautiful day, I headed to the Fundy Footpath for a spot of hiking.  I also wanted to check out what has happened to Long Beach, formerly an unofficial but often-used nudist beach.  That was the bad news for the day!  Long Beach, formerly accessible solely by the footpath or creative bushwhacking, now has parkway access, two parking lots, toilets, two scenic lookoffs and rank upon rank of picnic tables.  The Fundy Trail & Parkway folks must think that they’re going to bring in bus tours of beachgoers.  As if!  Just wait until the first tourist dunks a pinkie toe into the Bay of Fundy and learns how cold the water is – that will put paid to great expectations about the beach.  But in the meantime, barring some sort of agreement with the FT&P authorities, Long Beach has been lost for nudist recreation.

Having gotten the skinny on Long Beach I caught the trailhead for the Fundy Footpath there and hiked away eastward to Seely Beach, formerly stop #2 on the Footpath.  Seely Beach used to be a popular campsite among the ATV set and was accessible via the old – and I do mean OLD! – road that eventually connected to the Big Salmon River Road.  More on this later.

The section of the Fundy Footpath from Long Beach to Seely Beach is just about 4 kms in length, passes through challenging terrain, and is in infinitely better condition than the section from the Big Salmon River to Long Beach.  I have hiked both sections this year and the BSR-LB leg can best be described as sad, bad and difficult.  The LB-SB leg is, by comparison, mostly quite pleasant, even where it requires some tricky footwork.  But make no mistake about it, the Fundy Footpath is not a walk in the park.  It is a genuine unimproved wilderness trail and, you know, I like it that way.  It is impossible for bicycles, ATVs and horses.

The Fundy Footpath is not to be confused with the Fundy Trail, which more or less follows the course of the Fundy Parkway lying between the gate and the Big Salmon River.  The Fundy Trail is a nice walk in the woods, but it is a (relatively) wide, groomed multi-purpose trail through a tamed forest.  Baby carriages can be pushed along the Trail; the Footpath beyond Long Beach is definitely PG13 at minimum. 

One does not meet kids on the Footpath and maybe that is one of the reasons it is popular with nude hikers.  I’ve hiked one or more sections of the Footpath every year for the past nineteen and I’ve usually encountered one or more people along the way.  I’ve been keeping a rough tally of the wardrobe choices of the other hikers and, so far at least, the ratio of clothed to naked is about 3:2.  Of those who are clothed, none have shown any problem meeting those who are naked.  I wonder if these stats would remain consistent if one could account for each and every hiker on every good day.  I’d like to think so.  I believe that people who go off hiking in the wild are far more broad-minded than the average urbanite.
But why do we do it?  I mean, of course, why do we hike naked?  Someone on a naked hiking forum – a new guy of course – recently stated that he did it because he is sexually excited    by it.  Really?!?!?  How pathetic is that!  Others on the forum did not agree with him and he skulked away.

Why do I do it?  Well, truthfully, I do it for a variety of reasons and the number of reasons has expanded over the years.  The top two reasons have always been “to be closer to nature” and “freedom,” or so I used to state as my default explanation.  But there has always been the need to prove to myself that I was comfortable within my own skin.  Oh sure, there are a lot of other valid reasons related to health and fitness but bigots among the clothen usually have counter arguments at hand for those.  On further examination “comfort” is an issue, as is “stress relief.”  I figured out the first one all on my own but the thought about stress relief was pointed out to me by a woman at Kellys a few weeks ago.  “This is great,” she said, “no stress at all.”  The more I thought about that statement, the more I realized it was true.  Great!  One cannot have too many good reasons for doing a good thing.

In the past few years I have been able to say quite honestly that I do it for religious reasons as well, for I have concluded that unless one can fully accept one’s natural self as it is – one’s full humanity – once can never reasonably contemplate either God or another human being.  (If you’re not inclined to believe in God substitute “nature.”) So you might say that I do it, in part at least, to follow the dictum “Know thyself.”  I can think of no better reason.
                                       
And oh yes, the Seely Beach Road – see, I told you I’d get back to it.  As previously noted, in former times it connected Seely Beach to the Big Salmon River Road – it doesn’t do this anymore.  It has now been cut off by the extension of the Fundy Parkway and the days of ATV outings to Seely Beach are a thing of the past.  Yay!

The road itself is just the right width to accommodate ATVs and Jeeps – real Jeeps like M-38s, CJ5s, CJ7s and YJs, not the bloated luxomobiles Jeep now sells – but only for one-way traffic.  Unless I miss my guess this little road predates the internal combustion engine and was built for use by horses, a relic of the times when men were men and sheep were nervous.  The road is to my mind a little marvel of human endeavour, built by the sweat of men and horse gouging out and backfilling a 700 metre long diagonal course along the slope, rising 144 metres from the beach to where is now meets the parkway.  (That is a 20% grade, by the way – pity the poor horses.)  Parts of the road are now severely washed out and there is no bridge over the small brook at the bottom. (Bridge?  Horses don’t need no steenking bridges for so small a brook.) 

From the looks of things up at the parkway there is no immediate plan to rehab the Seely Beach Road as anything.  I really hope this is true because it means that Seely Beach will be left out “in the wild” and will remain a nudist-friendly beach and campsite on the Footpath.  On the other hand, since the Fundy Trail & Parkway has (in my opinion) so far ruined every other beach along their shore maybe the days of Seely Beach in the wild are also numbered.  That would be a real pity.  Use it while you still can.  So ended day number two.


Friday was another beautiful day for nude recreation, this time on bicycle as I continue to “train” for the Halifax Naked Bike Ride.  Anyway, that is what I told myself.  Having now seen the planned route for the ride I’m growing iffy about participating.  But in the meantime I loaded my bike onto the car and headed back to the Fundy Parkway, not to ride there but because it provides easy access to the Big Salmon River Road, the backbone of a more or less empty network of well-graded woods roads.

I had the place to myself – didn’t see another person once I left the parking lot.  But I did see plenty of wildlife, which is usually nice, sometimes a bit surprising.  Besides the smaller folk – red squirrels, hares and a groundhog – I also saw a pair beavers busily working on their dam.  Then there were two separate deer sightings, something that is no big deal because I see them in my front yard every morning.  More of a surprise was Mama Bear with twin cubs, seen at a non-threatening distance and therefore of no particular concern.  No, the concern came about when I was rocketing full tilt downhill on a dirt road when I found myself headed for a very tall bull moose standing beside the road staring at my approach.  All I could do was veer to the opposite side of the very narrow road and hope for the best.  Luckily, he blinked first and sloped off with a clatter to vanish into the nearby wood line.  All the same, it did get the old heart pumping doubletime for a few seconds.  All of the aforementioned animals looked sleek and well fed, and as the road is comfortably distant from any urban areas that means the forest is producing plenty of food.

The other animal life that was present in abundance out there were frogs, hundreds, more probably thousands of bullfrogs and leopard frogs staking out the best corners of several ponds and calling for prospective mates.  Every pond I stopped at was well populated by the not-so-little guys and I take that as a very good sign because they had seemed to be in rather short supply for a few years.  Ecologists consider them a bellwether species for determining the health of an ecosystem so it was nice to see them in abundance.

I pedaled eastward for a couple of hours, then turned about and retraced my route back to my car, keeping careful watch for bears and moose.  Seeing none this time.  All in all, another great day to be naked outdoors.

Support the Right to Bare Butts!

So, the 2016 Halifax Naked Bike Ride is on for 02 July.  That isn't very far away!  I'm not sure why they hold it so late there but that's up to them.  We don't have a WNBR event in New Brunswick so the proper thing to do is to support the neighbours' efforts.  I'm strongly considering going to Halifax for the event and I've put myself "in training" for it. 

I dragged my bike out of the garage last Thursday and, after spending about two hours disassembling, lubricating and reassembling the gear shifters -- and every other moving part -- I was finally good to go.  So far I’ve found time for a couple of two-hour rides around town, and a few less than an hour.  For those I was clothed of course, but that really isn’t in the full spirit of the WNBR.  So yesterday I headed out to a not-too-distant network of woods roads and got nearly two hours of straining my legs to give my butt a ride -- naked of course.  That is the only proper way to prepare for the WNBR, training in realistic conditions and experiencing the possibilities of chafing you just don’t notice when layered in Lycra. 

It wasn’t exactly a brilliant day but the slightly cooler temperatures made riding around that much more comfortable.  It worked out quite well, all things considered, and was preferable to either a truly hot day or a rainy one.  I’ve experienced both from time to time.  When I rode in the WNBR at Montpelier in 2011 the day was cool, even chilly, with a steady drizzle.  Prior to the start of that ride there was much discussion about whether we should proceed, given the weather.  But you know what?  Skin is eminently waterproof and much easier to dry after the ride than, say, anything else.  So off we went and a good time was had by all.  We all looked like drowned rats when we posed for the group photo on the statehouse steps, but we were happy drowned rats.

So that’s the way I look at WNBR events – go with it rain or shine.  Oh sure, if it is ridiculously cold or incredibly windy you have to be sensible, but a bit of drizzle shouldn’t put things off.  As an example of being sensible, at Halifax last year the primary date for the ride coincided with the arrival of the strong remnant of a hurricane.  Now that was a very good reason to put it off to a later date, and they did.

Let’s hope we get good weather this year and have a good turnout for the ride -- all nude, none lewd.  Support the Right to Bare Butts! 

Naturism as a belief system

We were having a discussion on FB the other day . . . well, I thought that we were having a discussion.  It turns out I was wrong.  What we were doing was being presented with an ill-formed statement and being required to sign on with it.  Dissenting opinions were not welcome.  I now know this because for the high crime of dissenting I was dropped from that particular FB group. 

This is funny, in a way, because the owner of the FB page, and also the owner of a related blog by the same name, periodically gets banned from FB for violating its rules;  then, once reinstated, he goes on about it, whinging and blatting about free speech.  Well, which is it?  Does he believe in free speech or not?  It turns out that one is free to say whatever one wishes on his FB page so long as it agrees with him.  Speak otherwise and one is cast out.  Really, this particular facebooker behaves remarkably like the FB police that he has often railed about.  The truth is that the two of them are really sisters beneath the skin.

But being cast out isn’t as bad as one might think because the FB page is mostly blather and the related blog isn’t any better.  I only joined because I like to keep abreast of what is being said within various segments of the Canadian naturist community and I had been checking both sites.

The issue raised by the blogger, then advertised on his FB page, was his contention that the Federation of Canadian Naturists, the FCN, should be split between East and West.  I countered that there was already an East/West split in Canadian naturism as well as a French/English divide in the East.  I put forward the position that we needed fewer splits and more solidarity, and that further splits were counterproductive.  (I don’t have the exact words anymore because I didn’t keep copies of my posts.)

He replied, in a somewhat snippy manner, that the issue was really one of funding – there wasn’t enough to go around.  I countered by asking how splitting the organization could possibly increase funding, noting that the duplication of administration was not an obvious path to fiscal health.

He replied that the issue was really one of numbers of volunteers.  I countered by asking which was the real issue (of the two that he claimed to be the real issue) funding or numbers of volunteers.

He didn’t reply, but he did have the final word – he dropped me from the group.  This is the internet equivalent of holding one's breath until one turns blue.  Not that he is actually holding his breath, of course, just that he chose to behave like a two year old child who couldn’t get his way.


The way I see it, is that if you can’t formulate a cogent argument, or you are unprepared to defend a silly argument, it is best to keep your fingers off the keyboard. 

Oh, I know, that isn’t the internet way of doing things, and I really do believe that everyone has the right to hold their own opinions.  I just find it strange how many netizens are like this particular facebooker/blogger and don’t really think about what they post.


But all this is by way of introduction to the real point of this post, the question of whether naturism is a belief system.  I think that it is. 

Think about it for a second.  Those of us who consider ourselves to be naturists largely subscribe to the official definition of naturism agreed by the INF: “a lifestyle in harmony with nature, expressed through social nudity, and characterized by self-respect of people with different opinions and of the environment.”  We also, largely, subscribe to the stricture that such nudity is, and must remain, non-sexualized.  These two points are our dogma.

Those of us who are 'Christian naturists' believe that non-sexualized social nudity is not at variance with holy writ.  Those who have no particular religious belief simply consider it to be “in harmony with nature.”  In other words we believe it to be natural, normal, modest and moral – one might add “righteous.”

The New Oxford English Dictionary defines a “nudist” as “an adherent of the cult of the nude.”  To begin with, that isn’t a very helpful definition.  Secondly, “cult of the nude,” seriously?  No really, seriously?  Who wrote that definition, Cotton Mather?  Simply using the word “cult” in that definition betrays the derogatory opinions held by the writer as it is generally used in a pejorative manner against religious groups holding to doctrines or practices which differ from the established religion of the land.  Religion, after all, has always been a powerful method of social control that has, at least from the time of the Roman Empire, been co-opted by the civil authorities to keep the people in line.  But naturism isn’t a religion, and it certainly isn’t a cult.  Cults have charismatic leaders, rigid doctrines, draconian enforcement of their rules and, in some cases, special koolaid.

As a collective, naturists aren’t slurping down the koolaid or waiting for the mother ship to arrive.  Our leaders are most often voices in the wilderness, our doctrines are pretty much as described by the INF and our enforcement of the rules never goes beyond expulsion for bad behaviour, if indeed we can expel the offending party.  A recent tribunal ruling in Ontario forbade a naturist community from expelling a person and has granted that person right of residence within the community, despite the fact that the community exists on private property.  The community, the adherents of the belief system, has in effect been told by the civil authority that they must suffer a heretic to live among them.

To return to our facebooker/blogger, he fancies himself some sort of leader among naturists.  He demands followers who agree with him and expels those who do not.  I suppose that makes me a heretic in his personal belief system.  Is there any difference in these two heresies?

I believe that there is.  The first is one of individual transgression against the norms and mores – the belief system – of the a community which he has infiltrated by deception; the second one is a point of disagreement between two individuals.  The first is one of community whose territory has been violated by an individual who is not in harmony with the belief system of the community; the second is of an individual unable to frame a logical argument or to state the grounds on which anyone else might support it.   
   

To sum up this page of rambling thoughts I would like to state what I believe.

I subscribe to the INF definition of naturism as “a lifestyle in harmony with nature, expressed through social nudity, and characterized by self-respect of people with different opinions and of the environment.” 

I believe that such social nudity is, and must remain, non-sexualized.

I believe such social nudity to be natural, normal, modest, moral and, yes, righteous.

I do not believe for a moment that the FCN should be split on any basis, East/West or otherwise. 

I believe that the FCN, while being desperately distant from being perfect, should provide a necessary form of group legitimization for naturists across Canada. 

I believe that more naturists should become involved with the FCN and become card-carrying members of the organization.

I believe that the FCN could and should be much more active in educating the public concerning naturism.

I believe that the FCN could and should be much more active in lobbying government. 

I believe that the specific focus of the FCN in lobbying government should be the immediate  decriminalization of innocent nudity.

What do you believe?

An update . . . in 2017 the FCN made a major blunder and in doing so managed to colour public perceptions of naturism in a very unfortunate way. See my blogpost The FCN does not represent naturism within Canada  for further details. Unless and until it cleans up its act I can no longer support it, nor can I recommend that anyone else support it. That's just the way it goes.  That said, I still believe that Canadian naturists need a central organization to represent them.  If the FCN can't or won't be it then we need a different organization that will remain true to naturist ideals.