SHORT NAKED HIKES #3 – SEELY BEACH LOOP

This hike has no official name because it uses a number of different trails.  For lack of official recognition I’ll call it the Seely Beach Loop.

The Seely Beach Loop may be challenging for some people in terms of length (14.5 km) but it is not too bad in terms of difficulty.  However, when you are doing Phase III of the loop keep in mind that this is a wild forest trail with plenty of gnarly roots waiting to trip you.  You will want a good solid hiking stick, not some skinny-assed collapsible aluminum pole.  See my Rules for Hiking Naked blogpost for other stuff you might want to take with you.

Where – Fundy Trail Parkway, via St Martins.

Access – Access to this loop is via the Fundy Trail Parkway – a day fee must be paid at the gatehouse

Once you’re past the gatehouse drive on and enjoy the views.  Watch for parking lot P14 on the far side of the Little Salmon River and past Long Beach.  Park at P14.  Conveniently, it has an outhouse where you can take care of last-minute business before starting your hike.

Trailhead – Parking lot P14.  Trailhead is signed "Seely Beach."

Summary of Distances
(All distances are approximate – taken from Google Earth)
Phase I – Trailhead to old woods road ~ 1.3 km
Phase II – Old woods to Cradle Brook access trail ~ 5.9 km
Phase III – Cradle Brook access trail to Fundy Footpath ~ 3.4 km
Phase IV – Fundy Footpath to Seely Beach ~ 2.1 km
    (Plus Seely beachfront ~ 500m)
Phase V – Seely Beach to Parkway ~ 1.3 km
Total trail distance ~ 14.5 km

Phase I – Take the marked trail from P14 and when you reach a point 50 feet / 16m or so from the parkway turn left and head off through the forest. This is a good place to get naked.  There is no trail at this point but it is easy walking through moss-carpeted forest floor with lots of room between the trees.  Keep far enough inside the treeline that you can't be seen from the parkway but generally no more than the 50 feet / 16m – there is a reason for keeping this distance.  Feel free to wave at any passing motorists – they can't see you but it is good fun anyway.

Fairly soon you will come to a pretty good woods trail that crosses your course at a right angle – DO NOT take this trail, it leads to the construction rubble dump behind P14 so you would have to start all over again.  Cross the woods trail and continue to parallel the parkway and, by and by, you will come to a second good woods trail – if you get too far away from the parkway you will miss it.  In fact this second trail is an orphaned section of the old access trail (and older horse road) that leads to Seely Beach.  Turn LEFT on this trail, it will soon curve around to the right, and follow it to its end.  This trail is in very good shape (there are even some of the yellow blaze marks still to be seen) and is easy walking (for your convenience I cleared most of the smaller deadfalls) until you come to the end where it is quite wet for the last 20m or so.  (Fun fact: in October 2019 the tracks on this trail showed that it is a favourite path for one or more moose – just thought you'd like to know.)  Once you've crossed the wet section you will find yourself standing on an abandoned parkway construction road built on top of an older woods road.  Turn LEFT and set off on Phase II.

Phase II – From the trail junction follow the old construction road West, becoming North, becoming Northeast – hike and be happy because there will be no traffic coming from behind and there is plenty of easy cover on both sides of the road.  The road itself is bad at first, soon becomes better and then changes to be pretty darned good, culverts excepted. About 700m on you come to a cleared area with a T-junction to the right -- go STRAIGHT.

There will be several more trail or road junctions to come: T-junction 1.6 km right, Y-junction 1.9 km left, T-junction 2.4 km right, Y-junction 2.6 km left, T-junction 2.8 km left, T-junction 3.0 km right, T-junction 3.5 km left, Y-junction 3.8 km left, Y-junction 5.0 km left and T-junction 5.4 km right. Only four of these are important but if you don't have a good map or satellite photo I mention them so you can use them to keep track of your progress.

The four important junctions are:
– the T-junctions at 2.8 km (where your path now becomes the Old Salmon River Road) and 3.5 km, both which might be sources of  vehicle traffic;
– the last one, T-junction 5.4 km RIGHT (Approx Latitude 45º28' 58.77" North, Longitude 65º20' 13.64" West) which is where you turn and head back to the parkway.  Another 300 m brings you to the parkway where it crosses the Cradle Brook access trail – there are wooden swing gates at this point, STOP out of sight of the parkway;
–  the fourth important junction is the T-junction to the right at 3.0 km (marked with a No Trespassing sign in a white barrel) which might be handy if you need to abort the hike and get back to the parkway in a hurry.  This junction leads to a maintenance area and then to the parkway, a distance of ~ 500m or 700m depending on the route you take through the maintenance area.

If you’re staying naked to cross the parkway pretend that it is a railway crossing – STOP, LOOK and LISTEN for traffic and, if the coast is clear, hustle your butt across the road and get down the trail out of sight of passersby.  We don’t want to annoy either tourists or parkway staff, right?  Right!

Phase III – You are now walking on the Cradle Brook access trail, a long-disused forest harvest road.  Very suddenly (150 m from the parkway) you will come upon a T-junction on your left.  By the condition of the two forks of the road the one on your left appears to be the obvious route – it is NOT.  GO STRAIGHT AHEAD on the road less travelled, it gets better quite soon.  Continue along the grassy lane to the next T-junction on the LEFT at 1.8 km.  Turn LEFT and go up a gentle rise for 200 m to where the road makes a 90º turn to the RIGHT.  Follow the road another 1.1 km to its dead end. This brings you to the start of the Cradle Brook access path which takes you out of the sunshine and into the forest.  Follow the YELLOW blazes painted on the trees to where it joins the Fundy Footpath 300m on.

Phase IV – You are now on the Fundy Footpath, a hiking trail that has welcomed naked hikers for years before the parkway was built and ruined it.  It used to be that when you met people hiking the Fundy Footpath you had a 50/50 chance of them being naked.  Now, the chances are lower but it still happens.  There are directional signs at the point that the access trail meets the Footpath – turn RIGHT, Seely Beach is 2.1 km westward – follow the WHITE blazes painted on trees.  Much of the trail dipsydoodles up and down through uncut forest until maybe the halfway point where it begins a long descent along the spine of the ridge that separates Seely Brook from the seacoast.  Watch for change-of-direction markers (double blazes) especially near the bottom of the ridge where it looks like the trail continues straight but actually makes a sharp LEFT turn and a sharper descent.  The final part of the descent to Seely Beach is on one of the Footpath’s many cable stairways installed with much labour and now in need of some maintenance.

Not the cable ladder at Seely Beach but much the same

Congratulations, you have reached Seely Beach.  There are two campsites here so you might want to ensure there are no textiles hanging about before deciding to take a rest and catch some rays on the beach in the altogether.  I don’t recommend going for a swim in the sea because the Bay of Fundy is just too perishing cold for it to be fun.

Phase V – Leaving Seely Beach.  Go to the point on the beach where Seely Brook drains into the sea and you will find the second campsite and a rough trail – an old horse road, really.  Follow the trail to the point where it crosses the brook without benefit of a bridge – there is usually some place a bit downstream where you can find stepping stones and get across the brook dry shod.

From the brook the trail takes a fairly steep 1.3 km diagonal course up the flank of the ridge to meet the parkway 122m above sea level – this is the cardio portion of the hike.  Be aware that you may meet people coming down this trail and there is almost no opportunity to quickly leave the trail or to get behind cover. Far  better to keep well aware of the trail ahead and to have a hiking kilt or a pair of shorts that you can step into very quickly.

Return to the trailhead.  Once you have reached the parkway you have two options: get dressed and cooly walk back to P14, or stay naked and cross the parkway when circumstances permit.  If you decide to cross the parkway remember to STOP, LOOK and LISTEN for traffic.

You’re back.  Hooray!

Now, that’s the route I took because of the circumstances of the day, BUT you could as easily do the whole thing in reverse, hiking down to Seely Beach as your Phase I.  Two items to note about hiking the loop counter-clockwise:

(1) if there are no other vehicles at P14 the chance of meeting anyone on the trail down to Seely Beach is pretty low.  However, be aware that there may be overnighters at the campsites; and

(2) the long downhill section mentioned within Phase III above now becomes a very long UPHILL cardio section.

But . . . different strokes for different folks.

WHAT’S BUGGING YOU NOW?

KNOW YOUR ENEMIES
The Flies of the New Brunswick Wilderness
also of Nova Scotia and Prince Edward Island


Walking about naked brings numerous health benefits, both physical and psychological.  This is indisputably correct – those who dispute the rightness of naturism usually fall back on superstitions about morality rather than dealing with real issues.  However, there are a few health problems too, usually resulting from sunburn and insect bites.  For sunburn the twin answers are common sense and appropriate sunscreen.  For the insects it helps to know your enemies.

If you’re a New Brunswicker, Nova Scotian or anyone else from almost anywhere except the inner cities of North America probably you already know everything written below.  But folks from far away – for instance, those who have been living in the depths of an urban area, or in a cave on Mars – might benefit from reading the rest of this post.

Here in New Brunswick (and adjacent provinces) the usual suspects bugging you are, in ascending order of size: midges, blackflies, mosquitoes, stable flies, deer flies, horse flies and greenhead flies.  Why does this matter?  It matters because these various sorts of flies are very different critters, respond to different stimuli, often attack different areas of the body and require different responses and preventative measures.

Disclaimer: What works for one person may not necessarily work for all others.  Personal body chemistry may bring about different results.  Some people are just naturally attractive.


MIDGES

New Brunswick has at least two kinds of midges the Chironomidae family and the Ceratopogonidae family.  Those of the Chironomidae family are non-biting midges, they simply lack the mouth parts to do it. In fact, adult Chironomidae do not feed at all, they spend their brief lifespan focussed on mating and reproduction, then expire and their little corpses feed other species.  Those of the Ceratopogonidae family are biting midges, the dreaded no-see-ums. 

Midges look a lot like mosquitoes but aren’t.  They are tiny, only 1-3 mm in length, but their bites still sting like crazy. Only the female midge bites humans.  Typically midges are grayish, becoming more reddish when filled with blood.  Their wings display dark patterns.  Ceratopogonidae midges are creatures of the late afternoon and early evening and they are not at all particular about where they bite you. 

So what keeps midges at bay?  Well, 98% DEET seems to work but do you really want to do that to yourself?  I don’t.  The efficacy of lower concentrations of DEET is questionable.  Midges are nothing if not persistent.  However, they are weak fliers and do poorly in windy conditions so the siting of your camp can be an important factor.
 
Some people claim that 0.5% permethrin spray is a do-all for dealing with midges and everything else including deer ticks.  But permethrin is a problem in that it is a NERVE AGENT.  It doesn’t repel the insects, it attacks the little beggars’ nervous system and kills them outright.  Permethrin is intended to be sprayed onto clothing, NOT ONTO SKIN.  So permethrin isn’t a safe choice for naturists.  Err on the side of caution and don’t use it except on clothing.  As of 2019 permethrin is not approved for sale in Canada; it can be imported from the US but the price is startling once you’ve paid for shipping.  Maybe that is a good thing – I wouldn’t use it.  Call me a wimp but I just don’t feature spraying myself with nerve gas.

Other folks claim that picaradin is the good option – I like it a lot.  Picaridin is synthetic piperine, an alkaloid extracted from the black pepper vine.  Like DEET it works by disorienting and repelling insects, not by slaughtering them wholesale.  Picaridin based repellents such as Icaridin and Piactive can be found in retail outlets such as Canadian Tire or the Temple of Wal.

What do I do?  When sitting around the campfire I rely of smoke from some sort of resinous wood – pine cones and cedar seem to be fairly effective but don’t keep 100% of them away.  I supplement the smoke with a picaridin based spray and that seems to work for me, but maybe that has more to do with the time of day than anything else.  They are attracted to light so one can hope that they fly too close to the campfire’s flames and meet a horrible fiery fate.

When it comes right down to it repellents provide only limited protection. The best way to avoid being bitten by the dreaded no-see-um is to schedule your outdoor activities in a manner that avoids the daily peak the midges’ activity.

Point of interest: I have yet to see a biting midge at Kellys Beach.

Midge in flight – Image thanks to ClipArtMag

BLACKFLIES

Folks from away might not know this but the blackfly is New Brunswick’s unofficial provincial bird.  Oh sure, the black-capped chickadee is a lot cuter but we have so many more blackflies that people have made up tales and (in Ontario) even a song about them.  If anyone should tell you to go easy on the poor little blackfly because he pollinates blueberry plants look them straight in the eye and call “bullshit.”  This is a silly folk tale and has been proven false, so feel free to swat the little pests.

These guys are small, not much more than 4mm long in a resting posture.  Black fly populations burgeon with the onset of spring and can last well into July.  The females of the species bite only during daylight hours and tend to home in on areas of thinner skin – neck, ears and ankles.  Of course, if you’re naked there are more such areas.  Blackflies are puddle feeders, what this means is that they gnaw a hole in your skin, wait for the blood to well up and lap up all that red goodness, possibly transmitting pathogens to you in the process.

Be judicious in your use of repellents.  DEET and picaridin are the most effective repellents, but they provide limited protection. However, blackflies like shade and are not strong fliers so even mildly breezy beaches are your friends in this matter.

Blackfly displayed – Image thanks to Google Free Clipart Library

MUSKY TOES

There are thirty-seven different species of mosquitoes in New Brunswick – Woo hoo!    No, not really woo hoo, more like “Yuck!”  Of these thirty-seven species, thirteen are considered to be major pests for human, one (anopheles) is minor and the remainder rarely bite humans.  Only one of the major pests (ochlerotatus cantator) breeds in salt marshes.  So, in terms of what you might encounter at Kellys Beach, this is the one. It is also the most common mosquito species found throughout New Brunswick. 

So, how do we deal with this pest, and all other musky toes?  Easily, it seems.  All mossies seem to be put off by the usual range of easily available repellents – DEET, picaridin, etcetera.  Besides, when the sun is out on the beach the mossies are cowering in the shade somewhere else.  Wind is another ally against mosquitoes which can make a maximum forward speed of five km/hr (3 mph) and a pleasant breeze on a beach usually exceeds that speed.  So you’re good on the beach but if you’re inclined to hike naked in the woods bring along some bug spray that doesn’t bother your skin.

Mosquito preying – Image thanks to Clipartbarn

OTHER SORTS OF FLIES

Some visitors to Kellys Beach whinge and moan about the flies, not midges, mosquitoes or blackflies, but deer flies.  Well, first of all, the flies that are sometimes a problem at Kellys are NOT deer flies. Yes, sometimes (rarely) there are a few deer flies at Kellys and some horse flies, particularly on the North Kouchibouguac Dune, but on Kellys most commonly the problem is either or both black stable flies or greenhead flies. See the pix in the text below.

Deer Flies and Horse Flies

Deer flies and horse flies are closely related, both being members of the Tabanidae family.  They are known for their speed (some species reaching 145 km/hr in case you're wondering – no, I didn't forget a decimal point) and aerobatic abilities.  Swatting a horse fly in flight is a good game to play provided you don't mind losing almost all of the time.  As with many other species of biting fly, only the females bite.  Adult female horse flies have mouthparts that are sort of the Swiss Army knife of biting flies: a strong stabbing blade, two pairs of sharp cutting blades and a sponge-like bit used to mop up the blood from the wound.  And it is a real wound that they inflict.  Horse flies can transfer blood-borne diseases from one animal to another.  If you get bitten, treat it as a real wound, clean it and disinfect it as soon as possible.  If you're at a sea beach and have nothing else at hand to do the job wash it out with salt water.  Sure, it'll hurt like stink but that's preferable to developing, for instance, tularemia.

Horse fly image thanks to Bruce Marlin and Wikimedia Commons

Deer flies and horse flies most often attack the uppermost part of your body, your head for instance. There are ways and means of dealing with this issue, for instance wearing long upright feathers or a fake dragonfly on your hat – yeah, you look like a dufus but you don’t get bitten. (Decoy dragonflies can be bought on-line.)  Or, speaking of dufusses (dufii?) you can opt to carry an umbrella treated with diluted Tanglefoot. Neither deer flies nor horse flies respond well to repellants unless you are using something that will probably kill you too – DEET has no effect.  Deer flies are quite fragile; horse flies are not.  Deer flies can be dealt with by means of a cheap swatter; horse flies seem to require a billy club.  No, seriously, a good smack with a baseball cap should incapacitate them long enough for you to beat them to death with the club.

Deer fly image thanks to Wikimedia Commons

Stable Flies

The black stable flies at Kellys are the primary cause of annoyance to sunbathers.  These critters are small all-black versions of the standard housefly, about 8-9 mm long from head to the tips of their folded wings.  They are quite sturdy little creatures and often need to be swatted then stomped because they will stagger to their feet and fly away from a swat alone. Like the blackflies they are puddle feeders.  They prefer to dine on the lower portions of the body – calves and ankles – and they don’t give a damn about DEET.  However, they do not like to chew their way through oil and a generous slathering of baby oil both puts them off and slows them down so that you can swat and stomp before they can bite.  Re-apply the baby oil after swimming or wading, and whenever you notice that it is losing its effectiveness.  Picaradine spray actually works against stable flies, as soon as they alight on it they bugger off without attempting to bite.

Black stable fly image thanks to Fir0002/Flagstaffotos and Wikimedia Commons

 Greenhead Flies

Greenhead flies (Tabanus nigrovittatus) are the worst of the bunch. In fact they are a large type of horse fly so everything already said about that species applies to the greenheads.  Greenheads are BIG and they don't seem to have any particular preference about where to bite.  When they bite they actually take a chunk of skin out of you. Luckily they are slow to bite following lighting on your skin, stupid and surprisingly fragile. A simple swat usually kills them but feel free to give them a stomp to register your disapproval of their species. Also lucky is the fact that their season is short.  DEET based repellents don't work against the greenheads any better than they do against the stable flies.

Greenhead fly image thanks to Maximilian Paradiz and Wikimedia Commons

However . . . one source recommends using Avon Skin-so-Soft bath oil.  Avon disagrees but . . . if a good coating of oil has the same effect on greenheads that it seems to have on stable flies maybe it is worth a try.

Meanwhile, some guy in New Jersey has invented a device that he claims wards them off.  This is the "Greenhead Greenaid" which he sells from a website of the same name.  On this item I have no opinion.  I will reserve judgement until I have seen it work, or not.  If you try it please let me know if it was worth the $20 US.

So there you go, there is the line-up of usual suspects.  Have fun in the sun . . . and say a word of thanks to every dragonfly you see, they prey on every one of the pest species noted above.

SHORT NAKED HIKES #2 – AQUEDUCT TRAIL

AQUEDUCT TRAIL

This is not an official hiking trail and it has no official name, these two facts combine to explain why it isn't overrun with hikers.  It is the access trail for the water conduit from the Ludgate Lake reservoir to the NB Power generating station at Coleson Cove . . . (water conduit = aqueduct – so I call it the Aqueduct Trail . . . that works for me.)

Where – Hwy #1, West of Saint John, NB – Lat/Long 45º11'49.57" North, 66º12'54.36 West .  Use these coordinates to look it up on Google Earth and get a god’s eye view of the lay of the land.

Access – Directly to the south side of Hwy #1 about halfway between the exit for the Spruce Lake Industrial Park and the exit for Prince of Wales.  If you can see Ludgate Lake on the north side of the highway, la,

Ludgate Lake to the North

look for this pumphouse and gate on the south side – that’s the trailhead . . .

If you are coming from Saint John take the Prince of Wales exit and come back on the eastbound lanes of Hwy #1 so you can park on the south side of the highway.

There is no parking area per se but the shoulder of the road is broad enough to safely park near the gate.   The trailhead is easily recognized but not signed.  Once through the gate, past the pumphouse and a hundred metres or so past the open area beyond (the natural gas pipeline right-of-way) you should be okay to get naked.

Length – Trailhead to turnaround point is approx 2.2 km, a nice short hike with the added benefit of it being all in the open so you can work on your tan while you hike.

Degree of difficulty – Easy

Description – The trail is a single lane with loose stone cover, is wide enough for ATVs and shows clear signs of being used by them.  There is scrub vegetation to the left that gets bush hogged every ten years or so.  To the right there is mixed forest, fairly thick and owned by the Nature Conservancy of Canada – you’ll see their signs every now and then.  This photo shows the long views typical of this trail . . .

. . . so if you see someone coming in the distance you have plenty of time either to slip into something less comfortable or to step off into the forest and wait for them to pass by.

Suitability for naked hiking – I know that this trail is used by ATVers because I’ve seen the tracks, but having hiked there 25-30 times over the last ten years I have yet to see an ATVer (or anyone else) out and about.

Overnighting – not recommended.  However, I know that some people have camped overnight at Cheeseman Beach –see Note 2, Option C below and my Cheeseman Beach blogpost.


Important Notes: 

1.  About three-quarters of the way between the trailhead and the second set of power lines there is a forest trail branching off to the RIGHT, la:  

This trail leads to Connors Lake, a fairly substantial lake surrounded by bog, and with a disreputable shanty erected by some ATVers who obviously have no intention of ever removing their garbage.  Before you get to the lake or the shanty the forest trail turns LEFT to join the service trail beneath the power lines and takes you back to the Aqueduct Trail after a detour of 1.6 km.



2.  When you get to the turnaround point, easily recognized as a wide open area in the middle of nowhere, you have a number of options open to you:

Option A, turn around and go back to the trailhead. 

Option B, go straight.  This is NOT a good option.  Another 200 metres brings you to the Burchill Stream where, many years ago, the roadway had been washed out quite comprehensively.  Not recommended.

Option C, turn RIGHT and follow the overgrown road 300 metres to where the bridge that crossed Frenchmans Creek was washed away many more years ago.
At LOW TIDE you can easily walk across the stream without getting your boots damp.
At HIGH TIDE this is PERILOUS, read "STUPID" because the water at high tide can be 10 feet deep.
IF you intend to cross the creek check the tide tables to make sure you have enough time to get back before the rising tide starts to flood the creek.
If you make a low tide crossing another 600 metres of bushwhacking will bring you to Cheeseman Beach.
ONCE AGAIN, MAKE SURE THAT YOU HAVE PLENTY OF TIME TO GET BACK.
Visit this DFO website  for a current tide table.

Option D, turn LEFT and follow the much improved dirt track 800 metres uphill to the Burchill Road, which is a more or less abandoned paved road heavily grown in with brush on both sides (as of August 2019) and barely wide enough for a single vehicle.  However, it is sometimes used by the Coleson Cove workers as a lunch site, mostly at the dead end near Hwy #1. Sadly, some of the locals find it convenient to dump their junk on either side of the road – not very edifying.  From the Burchill Road junction you can exercise either of two options:

Option D1, turn around and go back the way you came, all the way to the trailhead.  This makes for a hike with a total return distance of 6 km; or you can try

Option D2, turn LEFT on the Burchill Road and follow it to the dead end, turn LEFT again and follow the ATV track along the pipeline right-of-way back to the pumphouse trailhead, a total return distance of 5.3 km.  The good thing about the brush growing in on the sides of the road is that you can get under cover in a moment if you hear a vehicle approaching.  Have a close look at this option on Google Earth before you decide to do it.

I have done all of these options at one time or another and have confirmed them all on 03 August 2019.  

SHORT NAKED HIKES #1 – MOUNT DOUGLAS BALD TRAIL

Mount Douglas Bald Trail a.k.a. Bald Peak Trail

Where: Welsford, NB

Access – Burton Lane, to the right off Hwy 101 immediately past the Hwy 7 overpass
There is a parking area there and nothing else, with the trailhead easily recognized but not signed.

Length – Trailhead to summit approx 1.25 km, not much of a hike but pretty good cardio due to the vertical, and the view from the summit  is, I believe, well worth it.

The view from the summit looking south

Degree of difficulty – “Moderate” with the following caveats:

– for the most part the trail is more like a dry stream bed strewn with small boulders and gnarly roots than a trail – footing can be tricky by times;

– the trail is not groomed at all and is absolutely unfit for mountain bikes or baby buggies;

– the probable demographic for this trail is “younger & decently fit.” Because of the treacherous footing the trail is unsuitable for small children or older people, and impossible for anyone with impaired mobility; and

– this trail absolutely should not be attempted in the dark, fog, rain or while under the influence of anything.

The trail has a great deal of vertical, rising 180 metres over its total length.  Almost all of this is in the shade of thick mixed forest -- nice! 

Only the summit is open to the sky and an army helipad there makes an excellent sundeck.  The summit provides great views to the south of Mt Douglas looking down the Nerepis Valley.

Suitability for naked hiking – If there are NO other vehicles in the parking area you are likely good to hike the trail naked . . . I did.  Just keep a good pace so that you don’t get overtaken from behind.  If there are other vehicles there you are taking a chance as this can be a fairly popular trail on nice days.

Looking up to the summit from the plateau

Overnighting – not recommended but possible.  There is no camping area at the top or bottom but there is a plateau below the summit that has been used by campers in the past.  There are no facilities and no water sources near the plateau.  A campfire gone wrong here would be a disaster.

RAMBLING THOUGHTS

I’ve been off my game for some time and haven’t posted anything.  I’ll try to do better from now on.

I am, for lack of a better term, a naturist advocate.  That is to say that I advocate on behalf of the naturist lifestyle.  I would like to be able to claim that I am a naturist organizer, but I can’t.  I learned a long time ago that it is very difficult to organize naturists.  Every one of us has our own schedule and conflicting priorities that make organizing any group event an iffy business.  When you add the vagaries of weather to the equation it gets much worse.

Since I cannot manage to organize group naturist events I settle for advocating in general terms.  I have no difficulty talking to anyone, women or men, about naturism.  In doing this I have recruited a few new members and learned a few important things.

First, women are an easier audience than men, most are willing to discuss it, at least on the theoretical level, and many want details.  The fine print matters to them.

Second, talking to women about naturism can reveal some of the problems they have with participating.  Many, maybe most, of those problems deal with the men in their lives.  This is enlightening because conventional wisdom tells us that women do not participate because they lack confidence due to body image issues.  Some women see it differently.

A few have told me that they couldn't go to a naturist beach because their partner won’t.  When asked “Why not?” the usual response is “He’s too shy.”  Further probing reveals that the man has body issues, usually relating to fear of having a penis smaller than other men on the beach.  Oh the fear of comparison.  HINT FOR GUYS: Stop looking closely at people’s fun bits, it is rude . . . and weird too.

Other women have told me that they would be happy to go to a naturist beach but their partner is just “too sexual,” unable to separate the concepts of nudity and sex.  HINT FOR GUYS: Grow up!  There are times and places for sex and a public beach doesn’t provide either. 

Still other women have told me that their partner is simply too possessive and would object to other men seeing “his woman” naked.  To me this seems to be an extension of the problem of being too sexual, projecting that same attitude on all other men.  HINT FOR GUYS:  Naturism is by definition non-sexual social nudity.

All this information gained from chatting with women helps me to explain some of the behaviours I have noted at the gym: guys getting dressed or undressed in a shower stall; guys coming into the sauna fully clothed.  (Yeech!)  These behaviours have often made me ask myself “What the hell is wrong with men these days?”

I got some potential answers to that question the other day when I left the beach and went to the showers.  In the change room I witnessed three different scenes of hysteria (there’s no other proper word for it) from small boys as their fathers tried to wrangle them out of their swimsuits and into the showers.  “I hate being naked,” one little boy screamed.  “Huh!” I thought, “that’s weird.” When I was a kid nobody batted an eye about swimming naked at Scout camp, YMCA camp or wherever.  Half of my boyhood fishing trips ended up with skinnydipping, it was simply the done thing.  Apparently these days are gone, replaced by early childhood education in fear and loathing.  It seems that we are somehow training boys from infancy to be ashamed and afraid of their own bodies.  This is a very unhealthy situation.